“OK this is your last present Jordan” said mum. I opened it as fast as i could, i look through the tear and realist its a lamp with cool colorful beads in it,”Cool thanks so much mum and dad. ” i go over and give them the biggest hug. i make sure to walk up the stairs very carefully so i don’t drop it it’s my favorite present, i place it on my bedside table and go down to eat my birthday dinner. as soon as i finish i run upstairs to check my lamp but i look up and theirs glass and beads everywhere .
What do i do?
SO WHAT LIES AHEAD OFF US MUST NEVER BE SPOCKEN OF AGAIN. “got it sis” those where his words before he dobbed me in for spilling coke all over the carpet. Mum was really mad at me and made me give in my phone for a whole week! Ill make my brother pay it was his fult he triped me making me drop my coke(which I wasn’t meant to drink anyway) ill dob him in for stealing 20 bucks from mum then see how it feels. He will never say a word again.
It was a cold and windy night and Jordan was home alone but all the sudden he heard noises. I opened the my bedroom door and sore nothing so I went a bit further, but then I get hit from the back and black out. It takes me a while to realise what happened I slowly get up and look for the person who tried to kill me. I look around and see nothing< it felt like it was a dream well I wanted it to be but it was not. Mum and dad get home and I tell them everything but they didn’t believe me.
Everything was a blur I could bleary keep my eyes open, it took me about five minutes to get up but then I heard I really faint noise from around the corner, I still didn’t know where I was it was dark and cold. All the sudden I see something chasing after me as it came rushing towards me I started to sprint scared for my life. But all the sudden it said stop are you ok it was in a voice I had heard before. Turns out it was just my friend Tracy seeing if I was alright, what a fright it gave me.
Physical: the main character in the story was a cat it didn’t say what it looked like all it said was the cat had big ears. Having big ears plays a role in the story because before this I thought it was a human but when it said “he sat down by me and told me I had very big ears” this made me thinking he might not be a human. It didn’t say much about how the cat changed but the story it was saying how every morning he gets woken up so I can infer that over the time he got a lot older and more muttered not only cause his getting older but because he lived on his own for a little bit of time.
Intellectual: I would describe this cat as very smart because in the story it was talking about how he lived own his own and find his own food and living on your own is not easy so he or she is very smart for a cat. This character knows a lot probably because his more experienced with life. This cat defiantly thrive in his or her world because he didn’t know how to live on his own but he learnt and he was fine. This character learns how to live on his own as the story goes on.
Emotional: I think the character felt happy most of the time cause he said I like living own my own theirs no one to bug me at the start I think he was a bit nervous at the start when he started living on his own. His feelings change through the story because he went from living by himself to living with a family I think at the start he was happy but lonely and when he got his new family he felt happier.
Social: I think he gets on quite well with other people in the story because he sounded really happy when he got his new family. He didn’t really choose who his friends are but once he met them he really liked them and he likes them cause there really nice. It effects the story because if he was shy he would have ran away from the boy but instead he was nice and he let him speak to him.
Philosophical: this character is very chill on how his life goes and he doesn’t give a care in the world. This characters belief is that his life his happy and nothings bad in his life. This affects how he acts because he could be really shy to the family but his not and he goes real close to them without caring. The family beliefs where that he will be a good pet.
I found it interesting when Elio mentioned that “he might be unhappy where he is going to school also he might be upset about something” because it showed me that he was interested book and he felt like he was in the book. I also liked how throughout the whole text he was talking about how the characters on the book felt and how he felt.
I found Liora’s piece very interesting because explained what the 5 steps where while explaining what she got out of the story and I thought this was good because she didn’t have to waist her time and do both of the paragraphs.
I think stellas piece was really good because she went for the feeling side she really went in depth how every character felt. This was good because the actual story had a big part on feelings
Fiction is all about a character
In all fiction story’s you need a character and in this story the two main characters are Charles and Laurie. It’s Laurie’s first day of school and he wears jeans and a belt this was really different from I’m normally wearing overalls and bibs, Charles on the other hand was fresh well this is what Laurie thought he was. I would describe these two boys as bad behaves because there always getting them self’s into something. I think Laurie acted this way because it was his first time going to school and he might have been nervous or felt like he had no friends so he just wanted to have some fun. I think he was lying to his parents because he thought he would get into trouble.
Fiction is all about what your character wants
All I think Laurie wanted to do was have fun without getting in trouble. I think he also thought what he was really doing at school his parents would get worried or take him out of the school cause that’s what they wanted when they didn’t know Charles was there son. One last thing he wanted to do was to have some friends because half way through the story he started to get better I think he did this because he realised no one liked him when he was Charles.
Fiction is all about what you character gets or does not get what he or she wants
We do not know what happened after his mother found out or maybe she didn’t. but what I predict would of happened was his mother did find out and maybe talked to him how that’s not okay to act that way and was probably really confused why he lied to them about being Charles .I think he also didn’t get what he wanted for friends cause he may be acted this way because he didn’t have any friend and school just wasn’t going how he planned or just wasn’t what he wanted.
Fiction is all about how you character changes
At the start he really didn’t do well in school and was lying to his parents that he was doing fine and what he was actually doing was another kid which was probably a bad idea cause if he had already told them they could have helped him make friends and behave better. In the middle of the story it did say for a couple of days he was being nice and was actually doing what he was meant to, I think he did this cause he realised that acting like that just makes him look worse and he should just be himself.
Fiction is all about a world an author creates
This story was set at school and I think the author set her story at a school because this actually happens in real life where kids don’t do well in school and just come home and lie to their parents that there fine. I think a theme in this story was school because it was about a kid going to school and not getting alone with people which happens in real life.
“SCARLET stop playing with those CHUSHENS we need to go to your concert.” We hoped in the car and went to my concert I had to play the VOILIN. I was really nervous when I went on stage but after I started playing it wasn’t that bad but then all the sudden I drop my violin and everyone starts to laugh. I got really embarrassed and wanted to cry my eyes started to water. I ran to my mum “are you ok your eyes WATERED. I said I was fine but I really wasn’t. mum started telling me jokes and I felt better right away.
“Jess come down right now” my mum calls from downstairs, I always get worried when my mum calls me because I think I’m in trouble I never really know. I walk down the stairs to find my mum holding a big camera “its family photo day, smile” wait mum I’m not “insert FLASH” the flashed surprised me it made me fall down and hit my head, i insistently start crying. mum felt really bad she took the ugliest photo and posted it just to show me how much she was sorry, wow got to love your mum.
Read like a writer
Ideas: when I first looked at the story I didn’t want to read it on how long it was but after I read it I really enjoyed it. It taught me that it’s ok to be different because someone out there is just like you.
Organisation: I think it was set out good how they used there paragraphs. And they used all there punctuation correctly.
Voice: I think they used the voice really well, Ania had a lot of emotion which made me feel really connected to the story. I could imaging Ania’s mother voice in the story it was really sad and confused.
Word choice: I think it was really good how they through in tier 2 words or words we wouldn’t normally use to make us feel more engaged.
Sentence fluency: I liked how the sentences were structured and how they fitted really well in there paragraph. I also liked how they used compound and complex sentences and they did really well to mix them up.
Conventions: I thought they did really well with the conventions and I could tell they went over there story lots of times cause there was no errors.